I am, officially, a dad. Sure, some of you probably thought that that was evident based on the fact that I sired offspring. Well, there’s more to being a dad than fast swimming sperm.

About two weeks ago now, Linnaea managed to get herself infested by a virus, probably while at the store with Mater. She ran a fever for the first couple of days, but that may have been on account of her top molars cutting through the rest of the way. In general she was real snotty and congested. Poor kid had a real tough time sleeping for a few nights (and consequently, so did Mater and I).

Needless to say, Linnaea’s appetite was pretty scarce during this time. We were pleased to get anything – food or drink – into her. One night, Mater and I ordered pizza. As I sat down to eat, Linnaea wanted to be held. Spying my slice of cheesy Hawaiian goodness, she decided she wanted some too. So I fed her little pieces of cheesy crust and pineapple. And then she accidentally got a little piece of ham.

Ham is hard to chew if you are only used to chewing with your incisors. Inevitably, Linnaea gagged on the ham, unable to swallow it due to improper mastication. Now, to fully set the stage, we were eating dinner in front of the tv and our newly installed cable. We might even have been watching Myth Busters. So, I’m sitting on the couch, Linnaea on my lap, in the middle of eating pizza, and Linnaea starts to vomit. I calmly held out my cupped hand, and received into it the discarded contents of her stomach. Like any good, official father would do.

Linnaea was upset, naturally. But after we calmed her down, wiped off her face, and I washed my hands, we sat back down and finished dinner. I think she ate almost a whole piece of pizza.